Becoming an Au Pair in the US – What does cultural exchange really mean?

Part 1- sharing your culture

When looking into becoming an Au Pair in the US one of the first things you will read is that it is ‘a great way to participate in cultural exchange’. Doesn’t that just sound exciting and important- exchanging cultures? But what does that really mean and how can you do that? What can you expect from your host family and what will they expect from you when it comes to sharing culture?

Cultural exchange is typically defined as the exchange of cultural knowledge, customs, ideas, social behavior and experiences between people from different backgrounds (heritage, ethnicity or religion). As the word ‘exchange’ suggests, cultural exchange is a two-way street and needs both sides to be open to learn, understand, question and accept other views, opinions and customs.

Cultural exchange requires people to be sensitive, open-minded, curious and to be willing to engage in a respectful dialogue.  Cultural exchange can help people to broaden horizons, build bridges between different culture, to foster understanding and to create lasting impacts and create deep relationships. Being culturally aware and being able to work and communicate with people from different cultures, will not only help you during your au pair year, but also in your personal and professional life, even once your au pair journey has ended.

Reading all this might make you feel like cultural exchange is a big and important thing. While it is, it does not mean that it is complicated to do and experience. Even little things can help you to get emerged in another culture or to share your own.

So what are ways to share your culture?

  • Language – This is probably the most obvious one! Share your language- teach the children and maybe even the host parents some words or even phrases of your native language. Sing children’s songs, teach common words or maybe even read short stories to the kids.
  • Food – Cooking can be a great way to share your culture. It does not have to be an elaborate, multi-course meal! Even a simple dish- a favorite pastry or a traditional drink- can be a great way for your host family to learn about your culture. While sharing a meal, you can also talk about the background of the dish, when it is mostly eaten (e.g. on a special holiday) or what general eating habits or ingredients are ‘back home’.
  • Traditions – Sharing traditions is also a common way to share culture. For example, on your host kid’s birthday, is there a song that is typically sung and that you can share? Is there a special activity or game that is usually done? Or for example on New Years, are there any traditions that you typically partake in that you could maybe share with the host family? If so, why is this tradition so important and what does it stand for?
  • Activities – This can range from music, to sports, games or crafts. Is there anything that you as a kid always did or played that you could maybe share with your host children? Is there a popular children’s game that maybe is not common in the US? A song that is famous in your home country and that everyone knows how to sing along to? A sport that everyone watches that you could maybe watch with the whole family and explain the rules to? A typical craft that you can share? Even small things can help to start a conversation about your culture and can help others to get more familiar with it.
  • Conversations – Encourage others to ask questions and be open to answer them. Explain to them why you may not be used to certain things in the US and how it may be different from what you do back home. Explain traditions or customs. Be respectful and try not to lecture or to describe one way or being ‘right’ or ‘better’ but neutrally explain and point out differences without judging.

As you can see there are a lot of different ways for you to share your culture. It is important to understand that cultural exchange does not just happen within the host’s home but all around you and that sharing your culture does not have to be a ‘big effort’, but can also be done by just small gestures and activities that you can incorporate in the day to day life.

Be aware that you will be an ambassador for your home country and hence should make sure to represent your country, values and customs well. You should not just be thinking about what you can gain from cultural exchange but also about the impact that you will have, not just on your host family but also on friends and other connections that you make. Many people you meet may only know about your country through movies and media- just like your perception and knowledge of the US may also majorly be based on the same resources. By participating in a cultural exchange program, your presence and actions can change the perception of people on your home country just like your perception of the US may change as well.

Cultural exchange can help to overcome difference, foster understanding, to adapt to new ways of thinking and acting and to put oneself into someone else’s shoes. What may be normal and common for you, may not be so for other people- and the other way around. Something you or your host family has never thought about or questioned, now becomes something you or they think about or not take for granted anymore. Open communication, empathy, flexibility and understanding are the key. It is not about which culture is ‘better’ or ‘right’ but about accepting different approaches, values, viewpoints and opinions.

For your host children, being a part of cultural exchange can help them to become more open minded, curious and empathetic as well. They may learn another language or may become so interested in learning about other cultures that you may inspire them to participate in an exchange program themselves in the future or for them to choose a career that incorporates languages or cultural exchange. So make sure to help them with this journey by sharing your culture with them and bringing a ‘a bit of the world’ into your host’s home.

Now that we have learned different ways through which you can share your own culture, you are of course coming to the US to also learn about the local culture- so how can you do that? Read part 2 here.